Showing posts with label gene pool. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gene pool. Show all posts

Thursday, 11 January 2007

Baseball Caps

Wearing a baseball cap at a raffish angle perched on the back of your head at 45 degrees is neither big nor clever.

It just makes you look like a tw*t. Even more so if you wear your hoody over the top. Might as well wear a sign saying "I'm a thieving little scrote, where's my ASBO?". And un-tuck your tracksuit bottoms from your socks, knobhead.

I realise that anyone from outside the urban conurbations of the UK are probably thinking "what the chuffing heck is he rambling on about now?", but suffice to say that there has been a downstep in the UK's gene pool to the point that you have to think evolution has started to go in reverse.

Darwin must be spinning in his grave...


Saturday, 23 December 2006

Kid's Names

Gone are the days when giving your kids ridiculous names was solely the preserve of royalty and stars of music and film (a la Eugenie, Peaches, Fifi Trixabelle, Satchel, Dweezil etc etc).

Nowadays, for which the Beckhams must take at least some of the credit, the common men and women of this great country have taken to naming their offspring in increasingly bizarre and badly spelled ways.

To give you some recent examples, many of which have been taken from the "Announcements" section of my local rag (and all are genuine!):

Chardonnay
Mercedes
Kai
Kaj
Kenzie
Nyle
Demi-Leigh (does that mean she's only half a normal Leigh?)
Shardae
Helayna

And the best one of all for doing a Beckham and naming your kid after the place of conception - Clio!!!!!

I'm not sure which is worse, the names that are just plain stupid, or the ones that have had the spelling changed, just to be different.

For the love of God, do people not realise that their little ones either face a constant barrage of piss-taking for the next 18 years of their lives (at least) or have been perfectly set up to become one of the Burberry/baseball cap/chunky gold jewellery wearing little darlings that we all love to see hanging around on street corners after dark drinking Lambrini??

You just know the gene pool is screwed up....